Editor's Note: This is a satirical article. As if giving Evan Peters giant, meaty lobster claw hands wasn’t enough, the creator of FX-hit “American Horror Story” sent the show’s fans into panic mode when he announced that all four seasons were going to be, somehow, connected. Being a #TeamTate fangirl (He was just misunderstood, not a psychopath murderer rapist weirdo) with an encyclopedic knowledge of the show’s previous seasons, I decided to come up with a few conspiracy theories of my own. By Emily Gibson
After a quick breeze through the 45 aired episodes of “American Horror Story,” I was able to locate some interesting ties. Once you erase the plot holes, gratuitous violence and peculiar musical numbers, you’re left with about 10 hours of actual good content, and the links become blatant.
1. The color red
The most foreboding of the primary colors, show creators Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchuk could not have coincidently featured red in all four seasons. Whether it’s a couch, dress, or someone’s lips, each season incorporates this bold, unnerving pigment at least once. It may be subtle enough to go unnoticed by the common eye, but there’s definitely at least one red object, person, or bodily fluid in each season. Their use of the ghoulish, uncommon color is enough to surpass the realm of coincidence into a deliberate, subtle connection between seemingly different universes. But it begs the question: Is American Horror Story communist? Is this the beginning of another Red Scare? How far back does this conspiracy go? Is that the connection between all of the seasons?
If you blinked, you would have missed it! Red has a brief appearance in Season 1 during the hunky ghost boy, Tate Langdon's, confrontation with the police.
Wow-wee! It's easy to be distracted by the fact that Satan has reincarnated the previously sweet and quiet nun (odd choice, huh?), but look at her slip. You see it — the ominous hue of red.
Remember this widely GIF'd scene from Season 3? I bet your eyes were on the strange, blurred lighting, but they should have been focused on Emma Roberts' dress. Then you would have seen it: It's red!
You probably missed the red in Season 4, because you were busy trying to pretend like Jessica Lange wasn't singing in a bad German accent — but there it was, that devilish tint painted across her lips.
2. Wait... Are those the same actors?
Next time you spend your weekend binge watching the entire series on Netflix — like I do every weekend — look a little harder at the actor’s faces. It might not be apparent at first, but each season of the show features the same core group of actors.
Remember that appallingly negligent mother from the first season? She was played by Jessica Lange, who came back for the next seasons to play an appallingly negligent nun, an appallingly negligent Supreme witch, and, now, an appallingly negligent circus manager.
And remember that hunky, misunderstood boy, Tate Langdon? Well, that actor was Even Peters. He would come back in later seasons to play a misunderstood convict, a misunderstood frat boy, and, now, a misunderstood “freak.”
And the list doesn’t stop there. Other actors who have reappeared include Lily Rabe, most notably the Devil in Season 2, Francis Conroy, most famous for being the maid in season one, but not the hot one, and Sarah Paulson, who rose to power in Season 3 when she became the Coven’s next Supreme.
You might not believe me because they did such a good job disguising the actors with different haircuts and makeup, but they’re the same people. Just consult the extraordinarily long opening sequence, and their names will always be listed. The conspiracies are hiding in plain sight!
3. Bizarre historical nods
Give yourself a pat on the back if you knew what the Black Dahlia Murder was before you watched the first season of our favorite TV show. Do it again if you were already idol-worshipping Marie Laveau before she messed with the Coven in Season 3.
One of the show creators’ favorite things to do is insert a bizarre homage to a historical event. In the first season, the dentist in the basement of the Murder House murdered Elizabeth Short and her body was cut in half and discarded, as it was when it was foundin the real world in 1947. Was Elizabeth Short’s murder — called The Black Dahlia Murder — more than an odd shoutout, which lasted for a few episodes... then was gone forever with absolutely no explanation? Definitely! I’m sure Murphy and Falchuk had a good reason for including her that went beyond a desire to have another sexual, extravagant character and murder. I’m sure.
The show has continued these fun little historical references, like the inpatient in Season 2 who claimed she was Anne Frank and actually survived the Holocaust. Again, a multi-episode, unnecessary plot hole that convoluted the show but was pretty interesting, right? It was definitely necessary that she be there. Everyone loved it.
Then, in season three, voodoo queen Marie Laveau and slave torturer Delphine LaLaurie got their chance to be cast for a legitimate reason, I’m sure. And now, in season four, Murphy and Falchuk are referencing history to get a more accurate portrayal of historical freaks – but not for any of the main actors. They gave them something that’s a little bit historical but didn’t make them look, you know, actually that weird – Sarah Paulson can have two heads as long as they’re both still pretty. The point is, it’s historical. Another fun, quirky little nod to our great nation.
This tie has fascinated me the most. Murphy and Falchuk are creating these vast universes, but always tying it into completely unnecessary historical events from our very own history books. Some might say it’s because they think they’re clever, but I’ve figured out the real reason why...You know, the conspiracy.